Rain Checked

I wrapped a bandanna around its head over the eye that flashes red It tried for a smile metal sleeves for teeth a silver coated kind of tongue flicking up and down on a servo It wears a uniform on the inside little bits and bytes let them know this one from the others I…

shanegenziuk

February 15, 2011

1–2 minutes

poetry

I wrapped a bandanna
around its head
over the eye that flashes red
It tried for a smile
metal sleeves for teeth
a silver coated kind of tongue
flicking up and down on a servo

It wears a uniform on the inside
little bits and bytes let them know
this one from the others
I could tell them apart also
this was the only one with a teddy bear
printed on a bandanna
over a flashing red eye

I started to hum a song
while it scanned the horizon
artillery rumbled from far off
not ours
their reinforcements would be here soon
less like this one
because we bought most the stock
to my surprise
it knew the song
so we hummed and waited
for humans to kill

14 responses to “Rain Checked”

lunawitch15

March 29, 2011 at 10:12 am

that was great!

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1. shanegenziuk
  
  March 30, 2011 at 11:43 am
  
  Thanks Luna, great to have you on the site.
  
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Judy Roney

March 28, 2011 at 8:02 am

Amazing view of future wars and how they could be fought. Interesting visions I get from reading your words..and scary.

http://judyidliketosay.blogspot.com/2010/12/there-came-day.html

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1. shanegenziuk
  
  March 28, 2011 at 10:56 am
  
  Thanks for the comments Judy. Great to see you on the site. Would love to write more about what that future might look like.
  
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Sherry Blue Sky

March 27, 2011 at 1:19 pm

Really cool response to the prompt………a different outlook, and a scary one. Well done.

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1. shanegenziuk
  
  March 27, 2011 at 8:18 pm
  
  Cheers Sherry. Great to see you on the site.
  
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Ellen

March 27, 2011 at 8:53 am

Wow, so powerful and scary good! Your imagery painted futuristic thoughts of what’s to come(for me)~ I like how you went a different route; Well Done~

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1. shanegenziuk
  
  March 27, 2011 at 8:18 pm
  
  Howdy Ellen. Seeing how we have all those drones flying in war torn spots all around the world, I think it is getting closer to present than future. We don’t hear too much about it though, and when they are walking through our streets, it will be too late to get rid of them.
  
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Kim Nelson

March 27, 2011 at 4:21 am

You painted a picture of war in a most unique way, and that is the epitome of good writing… look at the ordinary in a way no one before you has. Well done.

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1. shanegenziuk
  
  March 27, 2011 at 8:15 pm
  
  Thanks for the compliment Kim, if I made the time I would write full time!!
  
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adeeyoyo

March 27, 2011 at 2:14 am

Okay, thanks Shane. I don’t think I would like a future where the power is in the hands of the few and the rest would be manipulated for greed – which is exactly what is happening today. I hope love and sense will prevail in the end… 😀

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1. shanegenziuk
  
  March 27, 2011 at 7:29 pm
  
  Always hope of that! Be well.
  
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adeeyoyo

March 26, 2011 at 8:40 pm

I like this very much, Shane. But I don’t get the title… 😦

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1. shanegenziuk
  
  March 26, 2011 at 9:16 pm
  
  Well it seems that our character was on the side that bought most of the machines, and the guys they were fighting were waiting for another order to arrive. I think that the future will give us miraculous things, but that only a handful of entities will be able to deliver them. Regional conflicts may well be supplied by the same manufacturer, as is the case today, but it will become more pronounced as the technological stakes become higher.
  So the other dudes had to take a rain check on their robots and fight the good old fashioned way!!
  
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